...To Derek Jeter Becoming A Tenant In Trump Towers At UN Plaza

Who'd have guessed that one of the best baseball players out there is such a stupid LOSER!?  I managed to get that LOSER! to buy an apartment in my signature building Trump Towers At UN Plaza for $17,950,000...and he didn't even blink!  What kind of LOSER! pays that much for 5400 square feet of living space?  I didn't even pay that much for Mar-A-Lago, because I'm a winner who knows that real estate is an investment!  For the price that LOSER! paid me, he could've gotten a 40,000-square foot mansion in Miami Beach complete with its own swimming pool and boat dock...but instead he decides to get a place about the size of the average suburban LOSER!'s crap-shack home!  Is it any wonder why he wears the number 2 on his jersey?  It's because he's a LOSER! and I'm a winner!  Can't wait until his girlfriend Minka Kelly recognizes this and decides she'd rather be Minka Trump instead of Minka Jeter!